November 22, 2013

Michigan couples break up over communication

Why do you think most Michigan couples call it quits? Are most divorces caused by infidelity? Money woes? Arguments over parenting style?

Actually, experts say that the most common reason for divorce in the state is poor communication. Whether that communication relates to finances or how to raise the children, it can quickly contribute to the dissolution of a marriage. A recent survey from a leading web site showed that the vast majority of mental health professionals report that poor communication is the reason couples seek therapy and ultimately break up.

Not surprisingly, communication needs differ by gender. Most men say that their spouse nags or complains too much, limiting their ability to participate in a healthy relationship. Women, on the other hand, need a partner who will validate their feelings – about 83 percent of women seeking a divorce say that their partner does not value their opinions. The findings of the survey align with other recent research results, which suggest that several types of marital communication can lead to the dissolution of the relationship. Some experts believe that defensiveness is a big contributor to divorce, along with criticism of a partner’s personality. Spouses who stonewall each other, or refuse to talk altogether, may also be at risk of a split, as are those who show contempt to each other on a regular basis.

Communication is not the whole story, however. About 40 percent of couples are unable to effectively resolve conflict, which can also lead to a permanent split.

No matter your reason for wanting a divorce, a qualified attorney can be your best asset as you move into legally dissolving your marriage. By working with you to draft an acceptable child custody agreement and property division plan, your attorney can help your divorce go as smoothly as possible so you can look forward to a bright future after the split.

Source:, “Poor communication is the #1 reason couples split up: Survey” No author given, Nov. 20, 2013